The best and most funny animal jokesFunny Animal Jokes

There's a huge variety of animals in the world, which is great news for laughter lovers because it means there's also a huge number of funny animal jokes and puns too!

And we consider it our duty here at LaffGaff to devote ourselves to gathering them all together for you.

So we hope you enjoy this menagerie of funny animal jokes...


Best Animal Jokes

A man walks into a shop and sees a cute little dog.

He asks the shopkeeper, "Does your dog bite?"

The shopkeeper says, "No, my dog doesn't bite."

The man then tries to pet the dog and the dog bites him.

"Ouch," says the man, "I thought you said your dog doesn't bite!"

The shopkeeper replies, "That's not my dog!"


Why do gorillas have big nostrils?

Because they have big fingers.


A lost dog strays into the jungle one day.

From a distance, a lion sees this and thinks to himself, "Hmmm, this guy looks edible, I've never seen his kind before".

So the lion starts running towards the dog with menace but the dog notices this and starts to panic.

As he's about to run he sees some bones on the ground next to him, gets an idea and says loudly, "Mmm... That was some good lion meat!"

The lion screeches to a halt and says, "Woah! This guy seems tougher then he looks, I better leave while I can" and then runs away.

Over in a tree, is a monkey who sees everything and realizes the he can benefit from this situation by telling the lion what happened and getting something in return.

So the monkey finds the lion and tells him what really happened. The lion says to the monkey angrily, "Get on my back, we'll get him together".

So the monkey climbs on the lion's back and they start rushing back to the dog.

The dog sees them, realizes what has happened and starts to panic even more.

But then he gets another idea and shouts, "Where is that monkey!?! I told him to bring me another lion an hour ago..."


A grasshopper walks into a bar.

The bartender says, "Hey, we have a drink named after you!"

The grasshopper looks surprised and asks, "You have a drink named Steve?"


How do electric eels taste?

Shocking.


Why are leopards no good at playing hide and seek?

Because they're always spotted.


Why do crabs never share?

Because they're shellfish.


Animal Jokes Pages

A collection of funny bat jokes to get your teeth into!

Here's a fantastic collection of funny bat jokes to get your teeth into!

We've been a hive of activity gathering them together, so make a beeline for these funny bee jokes and puns!

We've been a hive of activity gathering them together, so make a beeline for these funny bee jokes and puns!

A collection of funny cat jokes and puns

These hilarious cat jokes and puns will have you purring with delight and feline great!

A page of hilarious chicken jokes and puns

We've hen-thusiastically laid out all our favorite chicken jokes in this eggs-cellent collection!

Hilarious cow jokes and puns

Holy cow! These cow jokes are udderly brilliant - milk them for all they're worth!

Here's a snappy collection of funny crocodile & alligator jokes and puns!

Here's a snappy collection of funny crocodile & alligator jokes and puns! Definitely no crocks here!

A selection of the best dinosaur puns

These hilarious dinosaur puns are so great they could never become extinct!

A collection of funny dog jokes and puns

You'd have to be barking mad not to find these hilarious dog jokes funny.

These funny duck jokes and puns are sure to quack you up!

These funny duck jokes and puns are sure to quack you up! They're top of the bill!

A collection of the greatest elephant puns

These hilarious elephant puns are so memorable no-one could ever forget them!

A page of funny fish jokes and fishing jokes

We think you'll fall for these funny fishing & fish jokes hook, line and sinker.

A selection of hilarious frog jokes and puns

These funny frog jokes are toad-ally awesome! So hop to it and check them out!

A selection of hilarious goat puns

We're not kidding, these funny goat puns are the GOAT!

A collection of funny horse jokes and puns

It would be most un-neigh-borly of us not to tell you about these funny horse jokes.

A selection of funny kangaroo jokes and puns

If you wallaby a comedian, then you'd better hop to it and study these funny kangaroo jokes!

A page of funny owl jokes and owl puns

Here's a fantastic collection of wise-cracking owl jokes and puns!

A selection of funny pig jokes and puns

There's no ham-fisted attempts at funny pig jokes here - we're hogging all the best ones!

A collection of funny shark jokes and puns

Some-fin tells us you're going to like these jaws-ome shark jokes and puns!

A collection of funny squirrel jokes and puns

You'd have to be nuts not to laugh at these funny squirrel jokes and puns!

These turtle puns are turtley awesome!

It's time to come out of your shell because these turtle puns are turtley awesome!

 

More Fun And Laughter

If you enjoyed these animal jokes, be sure to check out the rest of LaffGaff for lots more fun and laughter. We have a huge selection of funny jokes, trivia questions and answers, funny quotes, quizzes, riddles and pick up lines, so there's something for everyone!