Black Cat Jokes

Halloween is the purr-fect time to tell these funny black cat jokes and puns! There are a fur few jokes here but we’ll sure you’ll agree they’re all paw-some!

Header image for a page of funny black cat jokes and puns.

Funny Black Cat Jokes And Puns

A black cat and a white cat fall into the water.

What did the black cat say to the white cat?

Meow.

What is a black cat’s favorite color?

Purrrrrr-ple.

I’m not superstitious…

But I never walk under black cats.

Which one of your pets should you scare on Halloween?

Scare-de-cat.

What’s the difference between a black cat and a frog?

A black cat has 9 lives but a frog croaks every night.

What is worse than raining black cats and dogs?

Hailing taxi cabs.

What animals are the best pets?

Black cats, because they are purr-fect.

What is a black cat’s favorite song?

Three Blind Mice.

What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Black alley cats.

What did the black cat have for breakfast?

Mice Krispies.

Why did the black cat put the letter “M” into the fridge?

Because it turned “ice” into a whole lot of “mice”.

What looks like half a black cat?

The other half.

What do you get if you cross a black cat with a white oak tree?

A black and white cat-a-logue.

Why do black cats never shave?

Because 9 out of 10 black cats prefer Whiskas.

Why are black cats such good singers?

They’re very mewsical.

What is cleverer than a talking black cat?

A spelling bee.

What kind of tests do they give black cat’s in school?

Hex-aminations.

What do you call a black cat that was caught by the police?

The purrpatrator.

What’s the first thing that black cat’s do on Halloween morning?

They wake up.

What do you call a witch’s black cat that drinks vinegar?

A sour puss.

Why are black cats so good at Halloween party songs?

Because they’re very mewsical.

What do you call it when a witch‘s black cat falls off a broomstick?

A catastrophe.

What makes more noise than an angry black cat?

Two angry black cats.

Why did the black cat join the Red Cross?

Because she wanted to be a first-aid kit-ten.

What hobby do black cats do in their spare time?

Witch crafts.

What do you call a witch’s black cat that never comes when he’s called?

Impussible.

What do you get when you cross a black cat with a witch’s rug?

A magic car-pet.

When is it unlucky to see a black cat?

When you’re a mouse.

What do black cats wear on Halloween night?

Paw-jamas.

Why was the black cat so small?

Because it only drank condensed milk.

What is evil, black and bounces?

A black cat on a pogo broom.

What did the black cat say to the fish?

I’ve got a bone to pick with you.

What did the mouse say when the black cat grabbed his tail?

That’s the end of me.

What do you get if you cross a witch’s black cat with Father Christmas?

Santa Claws.

Did you hear about the black cat who swallowed the ball of orange yarn?

She had Halloween mittens.

What do you call an overweight black kitty?

A fat cat.

What do black cats drink in the afternoon?

Kit-tea.

What do you get if you cross a hungry black cat and a canary?

A black cat that isn’t hungry any more.

How do you get milk from a black cat?

Steal its saucer.

Where does a black cat hang its washing?

On a feline.

Why did the black cats sell their homes?

The neighborhood had gone to the dogs.

What is a black cat’s favourite dessert?

Mice pudding.

How do you mail a black cat?

Use fur-class mail.

If there were ten black cats in a haunted house and one jumped out, how many would be left?

None, because they were all copycats.

What’s the difference between a black cat and a comma?

One has claws at the end of its paws, and the other a pause at the end of the its clause.

What do you use to comb a black cat?

A catacomb.

Where does a black cat go when it loses its tail?

The retail store.

Why did the black cat run from the tree?

Because it was afraid of the bark.

How do black cats end a fight?

They hiss and make up.

What does a black cat do when it gets mad?

It has a hissy fit.

Did you hear about the black cat who drank 13 bowls of water?

He set a new lap record.

What kind of car does a black cat drive?

A Catillac.

What is a black cat’s favorite magazine?

Good Mousekeeping.

How does a black cat always get its own way?

With some friendly purrsuasion.

How many cats can you put into an empty haunted house?

Only one. After that, the haunted house isn’t empty.

Is it bad luck if a black cat follows you?

That depends on whether you’re a man or a mouse.

What happened when the black cat appeared in court?

He committed purr-jery.

More Halloween Jokes And Fun

If you enjoyed our funny black cat jokes and puns, check out the rest of LaffGaff for lots more Halloween jokes and other Halloween fun, such as these:

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