Science Jokes And Puns

Scientific research has shown these to be the best funny science jokes and puns known to man. You definitely won’t get a bad reaction to them. So if jokes of a scientific nature tickle your fancy, then you’re sure to like them. Enjoy these hilarious science jokes!

Pages of really funny science jokes and puns

Best Science Jokes

Before The Big Bang

At the end of my physics lecture, I asked my professor, “Can you tell me what happened before The Big Bang?”

He replied, “Sorry. No time.”

Poor Resistor

What do you call a resistor that can’t afford rent?


Lost Electron

An atom lost an electron.

It said, “Man, I really ought to keep an ion them.”

I Don’t Like Them

I don’t like computer science jokes.

Not one bit.

Chernobyl Visits

I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve been to Chernobyl.

It’s seven.

Schrodinger’s Cat

Schrodinger’s Cat recently went on a crime spree.

He’s wanted dead and alive.

Sodium Atoms

Sixteen Sodium atoms walk into a bar…

Followed by Batman.

Strange Eclipse

What kind of eclipse is it when the sun moves in front of the moon?

An Apocaclipse.


If I ever go to prison, I’m gonna change my name to mitochondria.

I want everyone to know I’m the powerhouse of the cell.

Human Cloning

My wife said to me, “I have no idea how the science behind human cloning works.”

I said, “That makes two of us.”

Break Up

Why did the biology teacher break up with the physics teacher?

They had no chemistry.

Mix Up

My son came home from school and told me he’d mixed up the cranium and the skull on his science test.

I said, “That was a boneheaded mistake.”

Black Hole Collision

What did the black holes say when they collided?

Nothing, they just waved.

Unit Of Power

Teacher: Can anyone tell me the unit of power?

Class: Watt.



What’s the difference between USA and USB?

One connects to all of your devices and accesses the data.

The other is a hardware standard.

Chemical Attack

I was walking through the park last night when one guy threw sodium chloride on me and another guy covered me in sulphuric acid.

It was terrible. I didn’t know how to react.

Physics Book

After 20 years of working on it, I’ve finally finished my physics book.

It’s about time.

Smart Animals

Did you know that porcupines are one of the smartest animals on Earth?

Yeah, that’s right – science has proven them to be pretty sharp.

Disproved Rule

The old rule says I before E except after C.

This has been disproved by science.

Funny Science Puns

Why don’t they galvanize ships?

Because that would make them zinc.

My parents always brought me up to believe the sky’s the limit.

Which was a shame because I wanted to be an astronaut.

The local band stand was struck by lightening yesterday while the band was playing.

Only the conductor was hit.

Two blood cells met and fell in love.

Alas it was all in vein.

Did you hear about the urologist who became an aerospace engineer?

He developed an incontinental ballistic missile.

The name’s Bond. Ionic Bond.

Taken, not shared.

I don’t think I need a spine.

It’s holding me back.


Wanna hear a pun about gold?

I was going to become a biologist.

But all the endless coursework on hearts and lungs and kidneys and so on just made it seem like one long organ recital.

You know what’s cool about chemistry?

Endothermic reactions.

Why did the hipster chemist get burnt?

Because he touched the beaker before it was cool.

Who brings colorful eggs to chemist’s kids every spring?

The Ether Bunny.

Organic chemistry is really hard.

Those who study it have alkynes of trouble.

I’m fascinated by water’s gas form.

It mist-ifies me.

I like looking at a chart of all the chemical elements …


What does a biologist wear when they’re going out?

Designer genes.

What did one tectonic plate say to the other when they bumped into each other?

Sorry, that was my fault.

Did you hear about the neutron who was arrested?

He was released without charge.

Oxygen went on a date with potassium last night.

It went OK.

A chemistry lab is like a big party.

Some drop the acid while others drop the base.

What type of fish do two sodium atoms make?


How do you tell the difference between boys and girls?

Take their genes down.

I can eat sugar with either hand.

I’m ambidextrose.

What kind of bears dissolve in water?

Polar bears.

What do you call an acid with attitude?

A meano-acid.

Science One Liners

If Iron Man and the Silver Surfer teamed up together, would they be alloys?

Breeders of lab science animals are part of the rat race.

Geology rocks!

I’ve been trying to think of an electrical pun but now my head Hertz.

The cost of the space program is astronomical.

Air resistance is a real drag.

Organ donors really put their heart into it.

Do you find bone puns humerus?

Books on helium are so hard to put down.

It’s getting hard to zinc of new science puns because so many of them argon.

Funny chemistry puns always get a good reaction.

Do scientists who study the sun have a flare for research?

More Funny Science Jokes

If you enjoyed these hilarious puns and jokes about science, be sure to check out the rest of LaffGaff, for lots more great science jokes, including these:

Featured image for a page of funny Albert Einstein jokes and puns..

Albert Einstein Jokes And Puns

You don’t have to be a genius to find these funny Einstein jokes and puns relatively amusing! So we thought it was about time we found space for them!

Featured image for a page of funny atom jokes and puns.

Atom Jokes And Puns

We’ve been charged with the task of bringing you the funniest atom jokes and puns! We couldn’t say Na to a challenge like that, could we? So here they are – keep an ion them!

Featured image for a page of funny chemistry jokes and puns.

Funny Chemistry Jokes And Puns

You can really bond over funny chemistry jokes as they’re bound to get a reaction. Some of them may be bad but only because the good ones argon.

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Funny Nerd Jokes

Nerdy jokes (or should that be dorky or geeky?) are some of the funniest in our opinion so we’ve put together our top funny nerd jokes.

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Funny Physics Jokes & Puns

We think you’ll agree that these funny physics jokes definitely have potential! They certainly won’t cause any friction.

Featured image for a page of funny time travel jokes and time machine jokes.

Funny Time Travel Jokes

If you could go back in time, you’d miss all these funny time travel jokes and time machine jokes so what would be the point?!

Featured image for a page of funny geology jokes and puns.

Geology Jokes And Puns

We thought it would be gneiss to bring you these funny geology jokes and puns because they rock! We hope you appreciate the sediment!

Featured image for a page of funny moon jokes and puns.

Moon Jokes

We thought you’d be over the moon if we brought you these funny moon jokes and puns, so here they are!

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Periodic Table Jokes And Puns

You’re sure to feel a certain chemistry with this funny periodic table jokes and puns! At least from time to time anyway!

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Radiation Jokes And Puns

We were a bit worried if you would reactor not to these funny radiation jokes and puns, but then we thought, what’s the worst the fallout could be, so here they are! Read them before they decay!

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Robot Jokes & Puns

There’ll be nothing robotic about your response to these funny robot jokes and puns! They’re sure to recharge your laughter batteries!

Featured image for a page of funny space jokes and puns.

Space Jokes & Puns

We had to planet for ages, but we’ve finally managed to bring you this out of this world collection of astronaut and space jokes and puns! Read more now …

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