Poor Quality Oats

I bought some oats for my horse but returned them because they were poor quality.

The manager took my feedback.

Guy With Pram

I saw a guy with a horseshoe, a four leaf clover and a rabbit’s foot in a pram.

I thought, “He’s pushing his luck!”

Horse Ranch

It’s so depressing working on a horse ranch.

I’m surrounded by neigh-sayers.

Farm Job

I got a job at a farm but I resigned because they didn’t have horses.

I wanted something more stable.

Chiron

In Greek mythology, Chiron is a half-man half-horse who had great knowledge of medicine and health.

So he’s a centaur for disease control.

Horse Racing Obsession

My wife and kids are threatening to leave me because of my obsession with horse-racing.

And they’re off!

Half Man Half Horse

What do you call a half man half horse in the middle of an army formation?

The centaur of attention.

Horse Riding

To ride a horse or not to ride a horse.

That is equestrian.

Blacksmith Interview

I went for an interview at a blacksmith’s yesterday.

The blacksmith asked me, “Are you any good at shoeing horses?”

I said, “No, but I once told a donkey to get lost.”

Horse Walks Into Bar

A horse walks into a bar.

The bartender says, “Hey!”

The horse says, “Yes, please!”

So That’s What They Mean

A man was hospitalized with 6 plastic toy horses stuck up his butt.

Doctors described his condition as stable.

I Had A Dream

I had a dream about a horse last night.

It turned out to be a night mare.

What Kind Of Fly?

One day a fly is buzzing around a wolf hound and decides to ask him, “What kind of dog are you?”

The dog replies, “I’m a wolf hound.”

The fly says, “A wolf hound? That’s an odd name. Why do they call you that?”

The dog says, “Well it’s quite simple really. My mother was a hound and my dad was a wolf.”

The fly replies, “Oh, I see…”

Then the dog asks the fly, “So, what kind of fly are you?”

The fly says, “I’m a horse-fly.”

The dog says, “NOOO WAAAAYYYYY!!!”