Robot Jokes & Puns

There’ll be nothing robotic about your response to these funny robot jokes and puns! They’re sure to recharge your laughter batteries!

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Funny Robot Jokes

What do you call a depressed man with a robotic arm?

A sighborg.

How do robots exercise?

They do circuit training.

An art teacher, a math teacher, and a science teacher are all arguing over which one of them is the smartest.

The art teacher shows the others a giant clay sculpture of a dog he made. “This thing took me nearly a month to make.” He said. “Clearly this proves that I’m the smartest.”

The math teacher just laughs at him. “That’s nothing” she says. She then pulls out a huge 1’000 question math test which she took, and the score shows that she got them all right. “It took me two months to do this, and I got them all right on the first try!!”

“Oh you make me laugh” the science teacher says. He then pulls out a robot that he built which can do laundry, walk the dog, and shoot lasers out of its eyes. “Took me three months to build this beauty, watch and weep…”

Then the gym teacher comes laughing at all three of them. “You’re all idiots” He says. “Clearly I’m the smartest of you guys.”

“Oh yeah? Why’s that?” The science teacher says.

“Because I didn’t have to do any of that, and I still get paid the same as you!”

Why do robots go on vacation?

To recharge their batteries.

How do robots say goodbye?

They use bye-nary.

Scientists have discovered a planet populated entirely by robots.

They call it Mars.

What do you say at a robot funeral?

Rust in peace.

I made a robot who changes people into the opposite sex.

I guess he’s a trans former.

If a Norwegian robot analyzed a bird, then it…


What musical instrument do robots play?

The cyborg-an.

If you watch Wall-E backwards…

It’s about a little robot that would rather live alone forever than deal with fat people.

A man ordered for a voice automated robot car that does anything he tells it to do correctly without any error.

He got the car and started sending it on errands. He became very proud of what the car could do without mistakes.

One day, he was home and his wife told him to tell the car to go and pick the children from school as she was very tired.

The man agreed and said to the car, “Car, go and bring my children from school.”

The car went and didn’t return in time as expected, they knew something must be wrong.

Several hours later and no car, the man became apprehensive.

He dressed up and got ready to lodge a report at the police station.

As he and his wife stepped outside they saw the car coming with an overload of children.

The car parked right in front of them and said, “These are your children, sir.”

In the car were their landlady’s two daughters, their choir mistress’s two sons, his wife’s best friend’s daughter, their pastor’s son and their neighbor’s two sons.

The wife said angrily, “I demand to know if these are all your children?!?”

The man asked her calmly, “Just as soon as you tell me why our children aren’t in the car!”

Why was the robot tired when it got home?

Because it had a hard drive.

Why do so many robots live in Africa?

‘Cause Botswana.

A robot gets arrested.

He’s charged with battery.

A robot man walks into a robot restaurant.

A robot waiter approaches and asks him for his robot order.

The robot man orders a robot steak.

The robot waiter asks him how he wants his robot steak prepared.

The robot man replies, “Weld on.”

Do female robots have a…


What do robot dogs have?


Why was the robot angry?

Because people kept pushing his buttons.

The Titanic was recently visited by a diving crew with a robot submarine.

What they found out was completely amazing.

Even after 100 years of being sunk, all the pools are still full.

Some people claim Al Gore dances too robotically.

He says its just his Al Gore rhythm.

What is a robot’s favorite type of music?

Heavy metal.

Where do baby robotic vacuums come from?

The Woomba.

Know what’s ironic?

A computer asking me if I’m a robot.

What do you call a sad robot?

A woebot.

How do robots drive?

They put their metal to the pedal.

Nike just announced it will now be using robots instead of children to make shoes.

Unfortunately, the robots will be made by children.

A robot walks into a bar and says he needs to loosen up.

So the bartender serves him a screwdriver.

Why don’t robot chickens play basketball?

Too many technical fowls.

Why don’t robots have any brothers?

Because they only have trans-sisters.

What’s a robot’s favorite animal?

A cowculator.

Why did the robot fail the exam?

He was a bit rusty.

A robot tried to start a conversation with an attractive waitress

But he wasn’t so successful in doing so.

The error message read:

Error: failed to establish connection with server.

What do robots drink from?


What do robots eat?

A bit of this and a byte of that.

Knock knock.

Who’s there?


Art who?


I built an analog robot and asked it what gender it is.

It said it was non-binary.

My wife wanted a robot vacuum for Christmas, so I got a cheap knock-off made in Mexico..

It’s called Aye Caroomba.

What does a robot say when it has to use the restroom?


Why do robots like pancakes?

Because they are batter-y.

How do robots pay for things?

With cache, of course.

I invented a surgical robot.

So far it only operates on batteries.

Why are robot mechanics never lonely?

Because they’re always making new friends.

What do you call a robot in a boat?

A row-bot.

What do you call a frozen robot?

An ice-borg.

What’s a robot’s favorite food?


What happens to robots who become defunct?

They die-ode.

What do robots wear when it snows?


What do you call a robot that’s programmed to make scarves and blankets?

An extermin-knitter.

What do you call an invisible droid?


Why are robots shy?

Because they’ve got hardware and software but no underwear.

Why did the robot sneeze?

Because she had a virus.

More Funny Jokes

If you enjoyed these funny jokes about robots be sure to check out the rest of LaffGaff for lots more great jokes and puns, including these:

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