We don’t mean to count our chickens but these chicken nugget jokes and puns are golden! Why not dip into them now?
Funny Chicken Nugget Jokes
I tried to talk to my daughter about her chicken nuggets obsession but it didn’t go well.
It was a tender subject.
I ordered 4 drinks at McDonald’s…
So they wouldn’t think all 50 chicken nuggets were for me.
The waiter said to me, “I just want to let you know that kids eat for free.”
I exclaimed, “Good! I’ll take a water and some chicken nuggets and my daughter will have a steak and a kid’s Bud Light.”
My toddler asked me to give her chicken nuggets a checkup.
After giving all the nuggets a medical exam I realized my toddler was asking for ketchup.
Why did McDonald’s run out of Chicken McNuggets?
The farmer counted his chickens before they hatched.
Mary’s boyfriend called her on her birthday.
Boyfriend: Hey honey!
Boyfriend: Do you remember that mall we went to last month?
Boyfriend: And you saw a jewelry shop there?
Boyfriend: And you really wanted that ring?
Mary (starting to get a bit exited): Yes?
Boyfriend: But we didn’t get it cause we couldn’t afford it back then?
Mary (getting really exited): Yes?
Boyfriend: Well, there’s a MacDonald’s in front of it, you want some nuggets?
What did the chicken nugget thief say to his victim?
Nothing, he just took the nugget and dipped.
If you had 10 chicken nuggets and Jimmy tried to steal one, what would you have?
10 chicken nuggets and a dead Jimmy.
Skinny dipping involves a swimming pool.
Fat dipping involves a ranch cup and chicken nuggets.
Why are Chicken McNuggets like a jet plane?
Because they sure go fast.
My wife said, “I have some emails to catch up on.”
I said, “I didn’t realize you put ketchup on your emails, I usually put it on my chicken nuggets.”
A chicken nugget walks into a bar.
The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve food here.”
Why was the chicken nugget afraid of the chicken strip?
Because he was a top con-tender.
What do you say to a McNugget on the beach?
How about a dip.
What do you call chicken nuggets served in a pub?
What did the vegan say when they ate a plant based chicken nugget?
No harm, no fowl.
McNugget 1: “I’d Like to do a wild, breakdancing routine.”
McNugget 2: “Why don’t you then?”
McNugget 1: “I’m chicken.”
I had some wheat-gluten chicken nuggets the other day.
They were so life-changingly good that I was inspired to share my experience with others.
I’ve become a seitan worshipper.
There were 30 students but only 28 chicken nuggets.
How many kids didn’t get any nuggets?
Ten. Because only twenty ate chicken nuggets.
How do Chicken McNuggets visit outer space?
In flying sauces.
What do you call a chicken with no legs and no wings?
A chicken nugget.
What did the dad chicken nugget say to his son when he forgot his tie on his wedding day?
Where’s your Tyson?
I had some Burger King chicken nuggets the other day.
They were just offal.
I have an eating disorder.
I’m about to eat dis order of fries, dis order of wings, and dis order of nuggets.
What do you call a cowardly dwarf?
I think the Rainforest Cafe takes the whole rainforest theme too far.
Once I sitting there with my chicken nuggets and they bulldozed half the restaurant.
Jim Perdue, CEO of Perdue Chicken, goes to the Vatican to meet the pope.
He says “Pope Francis, it is an honor to meet you. As you know, I am a devoted Catholic, and I’m bringing a generous donation today – 2 million dollars – and in return I simply ask you hear a proposal.”
Pope Francis says, “Yes, of course.”
Jim Perdue says, “I propose you change all references of bread to chicken. For example, ‘Give us this day out daily chicken.’ And instead of bread-based Eucharist, you could give chicken nuggets.”
Pope Francis says, “Sir, that is really not a feasible proposal.”
Perdue says, “Tell you what, I’ll donate the $2 million no strings attached, but if you implement my proposal, I’ll donate another $20 million.”
The Pope merely thanks him and leaves the room.
The next day, at a meeting with his cardinals, the pope says, “Exalted cardinals of the Roman Catholic Church… we need to discuss the Wonderbread account.”
What’s a Russian’s favorite snack?
Yo mama so fat when she blows her nose chicken nuggets come out.
More Funny Jokes
If you enjoyed these hilarious jokes and puns about chicken nuggets, check out the rest of LaffGaff for lots more funny jokes, such as these: