Ocean Jokes And Puns

We thought we’d sea what you thought of these funny ocean jokes and puns! Luckily there are oceans of them to choose from, so hopefully they won’t make you salty!

Header image for a page of funny ocean jokes and puns.

Funny Ocean Jokes

How do you cut an ocean in two?

With a sea-saw.

I had a dream the ocean was filled with orange soda.

It was a Fanta sea.

Why did the hippie drown in the ocean?

He was too far out.

Why is the ocean salty?

Because the land doesn’t wave back.

What keeps the ocean from leaking out?

The seals.

What did the ocean say to the shore?

Nothing, it just waved.

Oceans are the friendliest bodies of water.

They always greet you with a wave.

Two wind turbines sit in the ocean.

One turns to the other and asks, “What music do you listen to?”

The second one says. “I’m a massive heavy metal fan.”

Why did the whale cross the ocean?

To get to the other tide.

What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?

A nervous wreck.

Why do seagulls fly over the ocean?

Because if they flew over the bay they’d be bagels.

What do you get when you cross the Atlantic Ocean with the Titanic?

Halfway.

Why is the ocean always blue?

Because the shore never waves back.

Why can’t the ocean take a joke?

Because it’s too salty.

Why can’t blind people eat ocean fish?

Because it’s see-food.

Do you guys want to know what I put in the wooden box I made and threw in the ocean?

Never mind it’s a sea-crate.

I was trying to look at a picture of the ocean but kept having to reload the page, it finally worked after 5 attempts.

That was refreshing to sea.

What did one ocean say to the other?

Nothing, they just waved.

Sea what I did there?

I’m shore you did, but can’t kelp it but laugh.

Why did the fish blush?

Because it saw the ocean’s bottom.

Why does the ocean roar?

You’d roar too if you had crabs on your bottom.

People who don’t understand how to measure depths in the ocean really find it hard to fathom.

I was trying to make up a joke about the ocean.

But I couldn’t think of anything Pacific.

Who keeps the ocean clean?

The mermaid.

Pretend you are on a raft in the middle of the ocean surrounded by sharks.

You only have a one day supply of water and a harpoon.

What do you do?

Stop pretending.

My son said he wanted to swim in an ocean someday, any ocean at all.

I told him to be more Pacific.

Why are oceans so strong?

Because of all the mussels.

How do you find electricity in the ocean?

Just look for the current.

Why aren’t all oceans the same depth?

They’re inconsistent seas.

What’s big and blue and if it fell out of a tree would kill you?

The Pacific Ocean.

What is the deepest part of the ocean?

The bottom.

A sole and a flounder are swimming in the ocean when they bump into each other.

The sole says, “A flounder!”

The flounder, to be polite, says nothing.

Approximately 95% of all ocean critters remain undiscovered.

The ocean keeps its sea crits.

They say when you find a sea shell, pick it up, and put it to your ear, you can hear the ocean.

Do you know why that is?

Because you’re on the beach.

There are more airplanes in the ocean…

Than submarines in the sky.

My friend has an unhealthy obsession with ocean life.

I told her to sea kelp.

A boat carrying red paint and a boat carrying blue paint crashed into each other in the ocean.

All the crew were marooned.

A penguin falls asleep on an iceberg.

When he wakes up, he finds himself encased in ice, floating in the middle of the ocean.

To his fortune, he spots the horn of a narwhal close by.

Thanking his lucky stars, he calls out to him.

The narwhal comes and the penguin asks, “Thank goodness you’re around, Mr. Narwhal. Could you break the ice?”

The narwhal stares at him for a bit.

“Ok, so what are your hobbies?”

There are three men in a boat in the middle of the ocean with four cigarettes, no lighter or any matches.

What do they do?

They throw one of the cigarettes overboard and the whole boat becomes a cigarette lighter.

A woman is walking along a beach when she sees a man splashing around feverishly in the ocean.

“Help, shark! Help!” he cries.

The woman laughs, because she knows the shark will never help that man.

A ship was sailing in the middle of the ocean.

A storm was developing in the distance.

As the storm raged, the captain realised the ship was sinking fast.

He called out loudly, “Anyone here knows how to pray?”

A man proudly raised his hand and came forward, “Aye captain, I know how to pray.”

The captain replied, “Great, you keep praying while the rest of us put our life jackets on… we’re one short!”

More Funny Jokes

If you enjoyed these funny jokes about the ocean, check out the rest of LaffGaff for lots more hilarious jokes, such as these: