Hawaii Jokes

Without de-lei, here we bring you all our favorite Hawaii jokes! Don’t forget to laugh out loud at them; a low “Ha” simply isn’t good enough!

Header image for a page of funny Hawaii jokes and puns.

Funny Hawaii Jokes & Puns

Why didn’t the passengers receive flowers when their plane landed in Hawaii?

Their flight was deleied.

I burnt my Hawaiian pizza today.

I should have cooked it at aloha temperature.

I couldn’t afford the trip to Hawaii.

I had to put it on “leiaway”.

How did the Hawaiian hipster die?

He walked on lava before it was cool.

Everyone thinks I’m weird because I’m addicted to ham and pineapple sandwiches.

But that’s just Hawaii roll.

My geometry teacher went to Hawaii.

When he came back, he was a tan gent.

I knew I guy from Hawaii who had a weird laugh.

Some describe it as a cackle, but I always thought it was more of a low ha.

What did Godzilla say after he devoured Hawaii?


Why is playing craps better in Hawaii?

Because it’s a tropical pair of dice.

How exactly to you get from California to Hawaii?

By crossing the specific ocean.

Why can’t Admiral Ackbar fly to Hawaii?

“Aloha Ackbar” doesn’t go over well at the airport

What’s a very, very quite laugh in Hawaii?

A low ha.

A tourist in Hawaii is amazed at how healthy and invigorated he feels after just a few days into visiting the islands…

He strikes up a conversation with one of the locals while they are wading out into the crystal clear, warm surf on yet another perfect island day.

“I just cant get over how beautiful this place is,” the tourist says excitedly, “I feel great! I haven’t felt this young and healthy in years! Island life is fantastic!”

The local says, “I know what you mean! Take me for instance. When I came here I was totally bald, didn’t have any teeth and I couldn’t even walk…and look at me now!”

The tourist looks at him and says, “Wow, that’s amazing! How long have you been here?”

The local says, “Oh, I was born here.”

Steve is in his car driving on the highway by the ocean in California when he stops and asks God for just 1 wish for being a super faithful and good human being. God instantly appears and tells Steve that he has earned right for one wish.

Steve says, “I wish for a bridge from here to Hawaii so that I can drive there and have a great time.”

God replies, “Ehhhh! Your wish is too materialistic! I would have to get the concrete, carefully think about the design, along with pipes and suspensions for balance and aesthetics. It would be quite a bit to handle on my part! Wish something else and I will grant it.”

Greg thinks for a moment and then says, “Hmmm… Okay, I wish to be able to read women’s minds. I want to know exactly what they’re thinking at all times, what they mean when they say ‘nothing’. Basically, I want to understand women inside out.”

God says, “So do you want 2 lanes or 4 lanes on that bridge?”

What do you call a Hawaiian with a cold?

A Polysneezin.

What kind of cigarettes do Hawaiians smoke?

Mahalo bro lights.

What did the animal control officer ask the Hawaiian dancer?

Hula the dogs out?

More Funny Jokes

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