Rain Jokes & Puns

Did you know a pluviophile is someone who loves rain? Well, we love rain jokes and so we proudly present the raining champions of hilarious rain jokes and puns! There’s no doubt as to weather you’ll like them! Be sure to check out our funny weather jokes too!

Header image for a page of funny rain jokes and puns.

Funny Rain Jokes And Puns

What did the rainwater say as it ran off the road.

Grate.

Rain doesn’t fall. Raindrops.

Did you know that by law, you are required to turn on your headlights if it is raining in Sweden.

Which is great but how am I supposed to know if its raining in Sweden?

What do you call a bear that’s stuck out in the rain?

A drizzly bear.

It started raining coins outside today.

I guess it’s just climate change.

Why didn’t the light rain hit the target?

It just mist.

When can 3 elephants stand under 1 umbrella and not get wet?

When it’s not raining.

What does a spy do in the rain?

He goes undercover.

Since vampires are supposedly hurt by holy water, I always wondered why priests don’t just say a prayer over every storm cloud, kill the vampires from above.

Then I realized why there are so many vampires from Europe. Someone already blessed the rains down in Africa.

Why did the dad prefer driving in the rain?

Things ran more fluidly.

What did the evaporating raindrop say?

I’m going to pieces.

What do you call a camper driving through frozen rain?

Van Hailin’.

It’s raining cats and dogs outside.

I think I just stepped in a poodle.

Why do cows lie on each other in the rain?

To keep each udder dry.

What do you call dangerous precipitation?

A rain of terror.

Why do sailors eat shellfish when rain is forecast?

It’s the clam before the storm.

I was just telling my friend Michael Rains about my unfortunate allergy to my home-grown barley.

My grains give me migraines, Mike Rains.

I think my wife is starting to get depressed with all this rain we’re getting.

Everyday, I see her at the window with a sad look on her face.

If it gets any worse I might have to let her back inside.

What’s worse than raining cats and dogs?

Hailing taxis.

What is an evil dictator’s favorite type of weather?

A rain of terror.

Does all this rain make you want an ark?

I Noah guy.

I hope it doesn’t rain Halloween night.

That would dampen spirits.

My girlfriend lives in another city. Last night she texted me saying “I wish you were here; the rains are beautiful.”

I replied with “So…you want me to c’monsoon?”

She hasn’t replied yet. I guess she stormed out.

The viking Rudolph the Red looked outside and proclaimed it was going to rain.

His wife asked him, “What makes you say that?”

He replied, “Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear.”

I don’t know if I got hit by freezing rain but it sure hurt like hail.

I was eating soup one day outside my favorite restaurant and it started raining.

Took me hours to finish my meal.

When does soil get rich?

When mother nature makes it rain.

Why is rain the best kind of music?

Because it has amazing drops.

Why don’t Native Americans like to do rain dances in April anymore?

Because April showers bring Mayflowers.

What’s the difference between a horse and wet weather?

One reigns up and the other rains down.

The weather man said there won’t be any rain for 6 months, but I drought it.

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