We have no truck with jokes that aren’t funny if you know what we’re driving at, so get a load of these hilarious truck jokes and puns!
Funny Truck Jokes
Earlier, I was driving behind an ambulance when a cooler fell off the back. I stopped and opened it up to find a foot inside..
So I decided to call a toe-truck.
Couples’ therapist: So, tell me what brings you here today?
Her: It’s really difficult to live with him. He is so literal.
Me: My truck.
With the rise of self-driving vehicles, it’s only a matter of time before we get a country song where a guy’s truck leaves him too.
What has 4 wheels and flies?
A garbage truck.
Cop: “I’m sorry to say this sir, but it looks like your wife has been hit by a truck.”
Dad: “Yeah, but she has a great personality.”
I just got food poisoning from a German food truck.
It was the wurst.
My dad decided to name his new truck “Stormtrooper”…
That way he doesn’t hit anything.
A truck carrying ten thousand copies of a thesaurus crashed on the motorway.
Onlookers are said to be stunned, bewildered, dumbfounded, astonished, startled, speechless, and amazed.
What has one horn and gives milk?
A milk truck.
A sixteen year-old boy comes home with a brand new Ford F150.
His parents look at the truck and ask, “Where did you get that truck?!”
“I bought it today,” he says.
“With what money?” says his mother.
They knew what a new F150 cost.
“Well,” he says, “This one cost me just fifteen dollars.”
The father looks at him like he’s crazy.
“Who would sell a truck like that for fifteen dollars?” he says.
“It was the lady up the street,” says the boy. “I don’t know her name – they just moved in. She saw me ride past on my bike and asked me if I wanted to buy her F150 for fifteen dollars.”
“Oh my Goodness!” says the mother. “Maybe she’s mentally ill or has Alzheimer’s something. John, you better go see what’s going on.”
So the boy’s father walks up the street to the house where the lady lives and finds her out in the yard calmly planting petunias.
He introduces himself as the father of the boy to whom she had sold a new Ford F150 truck for fifteen dollars and asks to know why she did it.
“Well,” she says, “Two days ago my husband left on a business trip. Yesterday I got a phone call from his boss and found out that he really ran off to Hawaii with his secretary and doesn’t intend to come back.”
“Oh, my goodness, I’m so sorry,” the father says. “But what does that have to do with my son and your truck?”
“Well, this morning he called and told me he was stranded because he got robbed of his wallet with all his credit cards and cash. He told me to sell his new F150 and send him the money. So I did.”
What’s bigger than a tow truck?
A foot truck.
I just drove my truck into a building.
Good thing I opened the garage door first.
A truck carrying toupees crashed on the highway, spilling everything.
Police are combing the area.
A mother gave birth to a boy with a defect, he only had a head.
There was no body, arms or legs to him but he was functioning normal and his parents loved him.
On his 21st birthday his dad took him to a bar, bought him a beer and gave it to him to drink.
Suddenly his torso grew out of his head.
Around him amazed the bar started chanting, “Drink, Drink!”
His dad got a second beer and gave it to him, this time he grew arms and hands.
The stunned crowd all chanted again, “Drink, Drink!”
He got his third beer and drank it himself with his new hands, suddenly legs and feet grew.
The crowd applauded and cheered.
The son couldn’t believe it and started to run.
He ran around in circles and then out of the bar.
Unfortunately he ran into the road, got hit by a truck and was killed instantly.
The barman looked at his dad, sighed and said, “He should have quit while he was a head.”
Why did the Mexican keep a wheel of cheddar in his truck?
In queso emergencies.
A truck loaded with Worcestershire sauce is driving through Saskatoon, Saskatchewan when it collides with a Nissan Qashqai.
The truck then careers down the road and hits a car from Massachusetts, injuring the two otorhinolaryngologists inside.
A bystander quickly calls to report the accident on his Huawei.
The emergency operator asks the bystander, “What happened?”
“It’s hard to say…”
A Vicks VapoRub truck overturned on the freeway this morning.
Amazingly there was no congestion for 8 hours.
The doctor told me I probably won’t be able to walk again after getting into an accident with a newspaper delivery truck.
I was crushed by the news.
To get a girl, some guys use pick up lines. Others rely on the attraction of their car.
So I figure a pick up truck should cover both bases.
If a cop pulls over a U-Haul truck…
Did he bust a move?
I overheard someone saying that a truck carrying Scrabble games overturned en route.
At least that’s the word on the street.
It’s crazy how fast milk trucks are driven these days…
One blink and they’ve gone pasteurise.
Two cheese trucks ran into each other.
De brie was everywhere.
Why did the man sleep under the tanker truck?
Because he wanted to wake up oily in the moining.
Anyone seen that new movie “The Truck” yet?
The trailer looks really good.
Did you hear Willie Nelson got hit by a truck?
He was playing on the road again.
Last night I had nightmares that I was a monster truck.
I woke up super tired and overly exhausted.
I was wondering why the truck was getting bigger…
And then it hit me.
What do you call a truck towing a smaller truck?
A mother trucker.
What do you call a Nabisco delivery truck?
An Oreo speed wagon.
I was really annoyed when a truck parked in front of me at the drive-in theater.
But at least I got to see the trailer.
Did you hear about the thief who stole a supply truck of disinfectant?
He made a clean getaway.
To reduce waste, our city has told food truck operators that they must donate all unsold items each night.
I applaud the effort, but given how little space the trucks have in the first place, it seems like there’s really not much room for waste to begin with. So, I’ve gotta ask….
How much food would a food truck chuck if a food truck could chuck food?
Did you hear about the LEGO truck that crashed on the highway?
Authorities are still trying to piece everything together.