Reading has many benefits so we thought we’d better book up our ideas. So we’ve turned over a new leaf and brought you these funny book jokes and puns. They’re definitely a good read!
50 Funny Book Jokes And Puns
My wife said, “Why don’t you write a book instead of your stupid word play jokes?”
I said, “That’s a novel idea.”
After watching me read “War and Peace”, my son asked me, “Dad, why is your book so thick?”
I said, “Well, it’s a long story.”
Today, my son asked, “Can I have a book mark?” and I burst into tears.
11 years old and he still doesn’t know my name is Steve.
I’m reading a horror book in Braille.
Something bad is going to happen.
I can feel it.
I once swallowed a book of synonyms.
It gave me thesaurus throat I’ve ever had.
A book just fell on my head.
I only have my shelf to blame.
I found the first four Harry Potter books to be quite light hearted.
The fifth one was dead Sirius.
I asked my girlfriend what book she was reading
She replied, “It’s a mystery.”
I said, “Doesn’t it say on the cover?”
I walked into a bookstore and asked, “Can I have a book by Shakespeare?”
The guy behind the counter said, “Of course, sir, which one?”
I said, “William.”
My book on clocks finally arrived.
It’s about time!
I just sat on the sharp corner of my hardcover copy of Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte.
Now I’ve got a Bronte sore ass.
All the comic books I bought from the store are missing the last page.
I have to draw my own conclusions.
I’ve written a book about falling down a staircase.
It’s a step by step guide.
$2.1 million worth of textbooks were stolen the other day.
All eight books were recovered.
I’m writing a book about WD-40.
It’s non-friction.
Apparently, Kim Jong-un has read every book ever written.
That’s why they call him the Supreme Reader.
I just wrote a book on reverse psychology.
Don’t buy it!
Two mice are chewing on a film roll.
The first one says, “I liked the book better.”
Communism sounds good on paper.
Unless you’re reading a history book.
My neighbor’s in the Guinness Book of World Records for having the most concussions.
He lives very close to me. In fact, only a stone’s throw away.
My parents read the book I was writing.
They said the main character wasn’t likeable.
It’s an autobiography.
A police officer accidentally arrested a judge who was dressed as a convict for a costume party.
He soon learned you should never book a judge by their cover.
My top three assumptions when my doorbell rings:
- It’s a murderer.
- It’s the police come to tell me everyone is dead.
- It’s that book I ordered about positive thinking.
I’m writing a book called “Stop Over-Reacting!”
If no-one buys it, I’m going to kill myself.
I went to the book store earlier to buy a “Where’s Wally?” book.
When I got there I couldn’t find the book anywhere.
Well played, Wally, well played.
If anyone is thinking about buying an autobiography, I don’t want to spoil the ending for you but…
They write a book.
I’ve just had a book published about saving the rainforest and what we as a human race can do about it.
It’s over 2,000 pages long.
I just read a book about Stockholm Syndrome.
It was pretty bad at first, but by the end I kinda liked it.
I submitted a book on confectionery to the publishers.
They said I couldn’t write for toffee.
I wrote a book on penguins.
With hindsight, I realize that paper would have been easier.
I read a book on prime numbers to my baby son.
And I had his undivided attention.
I asked my son to go get me a phone book. He laughed, called me a dinosaur, and handed me his iPhone.
The spider is dead, the iPhone screen is cracked, and my son is furious!
Today I launched a book aimed at 9-12 year olds.
I’m proud to say I managed to hit one of the little brats.
Two books meet in a library. The first book says, “You don’t look too well”.
The other book replies “Just had my appendix removed.”
I heard Optimus Prime is writing a book.
It’s an autobotography.
I got the book “Internet Forums for Dummies” from a friend.
But I need to take it back, because I already Reddit.
Why was the math book so depressed?
It had so many problems.
I liked the Harry Potter books, but…
I feel like the character of Nearly Headless Nick was a bit poorly executed.
What do you call it when you take a picture of your favorite bookcase?
A shelf-ie.
I forgot the French for strawberry, so I looked it up in a fraise book.
The preacher annotated his hymn book.
It was a guided missal.
Of all my books, my favorite is the one I received last Christmas.
There is no tome like the present.
I read this book about Mount Everest.
It was quite the cliff hanger.
I wrote a book about birds.
It flew off the shelf.
High school grammar books are parse for the course.
I once read a book about black holes.
It really sucked me in.
I read a book about gravity.
It was a heavy subject.
I’m reading a book about anti-gravity.
I can’t put it down.
The librarian didn’t know what to do with the book about Tesla’s love of electricity, so he filed it under “Current Affairs.”
I’ve just read a book about a bean growing up in Southern USA.
It’s called “The Adventures of Tom Soya”.
More Funny Jokes
If you got a laugh from reading our funny book jokes and puns, be sure to have a gander at our other funny jokes too, such as these: