Sick Astronauts

When astronauts get sick …

Do they feel over the weather?

NASA Mission

Did you hear that NASA is about to launch a new mission to say sorry to aliens for Earth polluting space?

It’s called Apollo G.

Galaxy Move

As soon as space travel is possible, I’m moving from the Milky Way to the Soymilky Way galaxy.

I’m galactose intolerant.

Astronaut Training

On my first day at astronaut training, I vomited and asked the instructor, “Is this normal?”

He said, “Not during a written exam, no.”

Moon Base

Putin has boasted that Russia is planning to build a base on the moon.

The idea is that astronauts will live there permanently.

When they were asked if they really wanted to spend the rest of their lives in a barren, lifeless, empty landscape, the Russians said…

“No. That’s why we want to go to the moon.”

Sad Astronaut

How do you deal with a sad astronaut?

Just give them some space.

On The Moon

Iamonthemoonandthereisnowheretogetabeer.

Thereisnospacebar.

Space Station

Why do people on the ISS use Linux?

You can’t open windows in space.

Two Astronauts

First astronaut: “Hey, I can’t find any milk for my coffee.”

Second astronaut: “In space, no one can. Here, use cream.”

Baby Astronaut

How do you put a baby astronaut to sleep?

You rocket.

Calm Astronauts

Why are astronauts always so calm?

There’s no pressure in space.