Zoo Pregnancy
One of the animals in the local zoo is pregnant, but nobody is comfortable talking about it.
It’s the elephant in the womb.
Elephant Jokes
These hilarious elephant jokes will never be irr-elephant, so you’re sure to never forget them!
Batman And Robin
What do you get when an elephant runs over Batman and Robin?
Flatman and Ribbon.
Balloon Elephant
My balloon elephant wouldn’t fit on the back seat of the car.
So I had to pop the trunk.
Two Brown Legs
What has 2 grey legs and 2 brown legs?
An elephant with diarrhea.
Medieval King
A medieval king was hunting in Africa. He killed a lion, an elephant, and a hippopotamus, and awarded the skins to his three squires back home in his kingdom. Thus, the three squires became known as the Lion Squire, the Elephant Squire, and the Hippo Squire.
As the years passed, the Lion Squire and the Elephant Squire became very jealous of the Hippo Squire because they wanted the hippo skin too. So, they hatched a plan to assassinate the Hippo Squire and divide the hippo skin between them equally.
Now the Lion Squire had eight sons, and the Elephant Squire had ten sons, but the Hippo Squire was childless. The Lion Squire and the Elephant Squire sent their eighteen sons to kill the Hippo Squire, but the Hippo Squire drew his sword and single-handedly slaughtered all eighteen of them.
And thus, it was proven once and for all that the squire of the hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squires of the other two hides.
How To Catch An Elephant
My grandpa asked me one day if I know how to catch an elephant.
Of course, I didn’t, so he explained how:
He said I first need to dig a giant hole, big enough for the elephant to fall in and not be able to get out.
I then need to put a large amount of firewood in there and burn it all until it’s nothing but ash.
The last thing to do is to line the entire pit with green peas.
Now, when the elephant goes to take a pea, you kick him in the ash-hole!
Swimming Elephants
Why can’t two elephants swim at the same time?
They only have a pair of trunks.
Spot The Difference
How can you tell the difference between an Indian and African elephant?
One of them is an elephant.
Elephant In The Room
I bought my friend an elephant for their room.
They said thank you.
I said, “Don’t mention it.”
Elephant Circumcision
My job circumcising elephants doesn’t pay much.
But the tips are huge!
