Rising Prices
Coffee, tea and beer prices continue to rise.
Anger is brewing across the nation.
Coffee Jokes
These funny coffee jokes and puns are sure to perk you up, so there’s no grounds for us not bring them to you!
Coffee Severance
I just got fired, and as severance, my company gave me a bag of used coffee.
They said it was grounds for termination.
Coffee Cup Thief
Someone broke into my office and stole all the coffee cups.
I’ve got to go to the police station later to look at some mugshots.
Disposable Masks
Today I learned you can use disposable masks to brew espresso.
That’s because they’re coughy filters.
Price Complaints
I’m really tired of people complaining about the price of everything.
$2 for coffee, $3 for coat check, $4 for an hour of parking…
I’m just going to stop inviting them to my house.
Sad Coffee
What do you call a sad cup of coffee?
Depresso.
Stained Teeth
My dentist said my teeth were stained.
Then he asked, “Do you smoke or drink coffee?”
I replied, “I drink it!”
Cold Espresso
What do you call an espresso with a cold?
Coughee.
Coffee Bean
How do you kill a coffee bean?
By decaf-itation.
Morning Coffee
I was sitting drinking coffee in my slippers this morning, when I thought to myself…
I really need to wash some mugs.
Two Astronauts
First astronaut: “Hey, I can’t find any milk for my coffee.”
Second astronaut: “In space, no one can. Here, use cream.”
Space Currency
What currency do they use in outer space?
Starbucks.
Frustrating Conversation
I visited a coffee shop where the Wifi password was wedonthavewifi.
It was a very frustrating conversation with the cashier.
Red Bull And Coffee
This morning I made my coffee with Red Bull instead of water.
After 15 minutes of driving on the highway, I realized I left my car at home.
They Called Me What?
Someone called me pretentious the other day.
I nearly choked on my latte.
