These cheese jokes are cheesy in more ways than one! But brie-the in and relax and see if you camembert our cheese puns.
We hope you enjoy this selection of the very best cheese jokes and puns! And if you do, don’t forget to spread them.
60 Very Cheesy Jokes
1. Cheese Factory
A tornado destroyed a French cheese factory.
All that was left was de Brie.
2. Cheese Thrower
I was walking down the street the other day when this kid threw some cheese at me.
I thought, “That’s not very mature.”
3. Welsh Eaters
How do the Welsh eat their cheese?
4. Cheesy Dinosaur
What do you call a dinosaur made of cheese?
5. Not Yours
What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
6. Bear In A Tree
What cheese do you use to coax a bear from a tree?
I had a dream last night where I ate cheese.
Now I’m having a nightmare day.
8. Mr. Cheese
How did Mr. Cheese paint his wife?
He Double Gloucester.
9. Cheese Puffs
What are cheese puffs made of?
10. Favorite Drink
What does cheese like to drink?
11. Cheddar Addiction
I’ve got an addiction to Cheddar cheese.
It’s only mild though.
12. Music Genre
Which genre of music appeals to most cheeses?
R ‘n’ Brie.
13. Medieval Castle
Which cheese surrounds a medieval castle?
14. Middle Easter Cheese
What do you call a cheese factory from the Middle East?
Cheeses of Nazareth.
15. Cheese Grater
My wife was preparing lunch today when she asked, “Honey, where’s the cheese grater?”
I replied, “Some would say France, others would say England. It depends on your personal preference.”
Why does cheese look sensible?
Because everyone else on the plate is crackers.
So I went to a party last night, and brought loads of cheese to share with everyone, but I don’t understand why there is Stiltons left?!
18. Psychiatric Ward
What cheese belongs in a psychiatric ward?
The other day this guy threatened to throw dough, cheese and tomatoes at me.
I said, “You wanna pizza me?”
20. Funny Girlfriend
My girlfriend thinks it’s hilarious to steal my soft creamy cheese.
The laughing cow.
21. Greek Woman
Why did the Greek woman stop eating cheese?
Because she was getting Feta and Feta.
Which cheese is made backwards?
23. Don’t Slice Me
Why didn’t the cheese want to get sliced?
It had grater plans.
24. Curly Hair
What do you call a cheese with curly hair?
25. Look In The Mirror
What did the cheese say when it looked in the mirror?
26. Cheese Diet
When should you go on a cheese diet?
When you need to Cheddar a few pounds.
27. Favorite Cheese
What’s Jay-Z’s favorite cheese?
28. Rude Guy
This guy threw some cheese at me yesterday.
29. Hide A Horse
What’s the best cheese to hide a horse behind?
30. Smiling Mouse
How do you get a mouse to smile?
A stone and a cheese were having a fight.
The cheese was winning, but the Roquefort back.
32. Talking Cheese
What did the cheese say to itself in the mirror?
33. Cheese Counter
I walked up to the cheese counter in the store last week.
I interrupted him and he had to start again.
34. Cannibal’s Favorite
What’s a cannibal’s favorite cheese?
35. Religious Type
What’s the most religious type of cheese?
Swiss cheese – it’s so holy.
36. Logical Conclusion
Cheese has holes.
The more cheese you have, the more holes you have.
The more holes you have, the less cheese you have.
Conclusion: The more cheese you have, the less cheese you have.
37. Keep An Eye On It
When should you keep an eye on your cheese?
When it’s up to no Gouda.
38. Christmas Leftovers
I was eating some cheese and crackers that were left over from Christmas yesterday.
The cheese was nice but I couldn’t finish the crackers.
I almost choked on a plastic moustache and some miniature dice.
39. Mouse Hotel
What hotel do mice stay in?
40. Flying Cheese
What do you call flying cheese?
Curds of prey.
41. A Pirate’s Favorite
What’s a pirate’s favorite cheese?
42. The A-Team
The A-Team are cooking in the kitchen one day.
Mr T mixes eggs and cream. Face cooks some broccoli. And Murdoch grates some cheese.
Then Hannibal walks in with a pastry case and says, “I love it when a flan comes together.”
43. Royal Duck
What kind of cheese sounds like a royal duck?
What do you call alcoholic cheese?
45. Clever Mice
We’ve found a few mice in our house over the last few weeks so I set a few mouse traps the other night.
The next morning I got out of bed and went down to check the traps. I was very surprised with what I found.
I went back upstairs, jumped back into bed and said to my wife, “There are some clever mice in this area.”
“Why? she asked. “Did they manage to get the cheese without springing the traps?”
I replied, “No, they didn’t go near them. They’re sat in the living room playing Scrabble.”
46. Beaver’s Favorite
Which is a beaver’s favorite cheese?
47. Clown Departure
Why did the clown leave the cheese circus?
Because he couldn’t get his Stilt-on.
48. With Relish
This guy walks into the sandwich shop and says, “Cheese sandwich please”.
The guy behind the counter says, “With relish?”
The first guy replies “Why, I would just love one of your delicious cheese sandwiches, my good man”
49. Vegan Photograph
My friend is so vegan he won’t even have his photograph taken in case he has to say, “Cheese”.
50. Grow On Trees
Would a smoked cheese grow on a tree?
No, but an Applewood.
I find ‘the difference between chalk and cheese’ is significantly greater when playing snooker.
52. Lion’s Favorite
What is a lion’s favorite cheese?
53. Mouse Photographer
I took a photograph of a mouse today.
He didn’t say “Cheese” but I could tell he was thinking it.
54. Poor Old Nan
My nan choked to death on a piece of cheese.
Now I can’t have my photo taken without bursting into tears.
55. Up To My Knees
I was up to my knees in cheese spread the other day.
That’s the last time I walk the streets of Philadelphia.
56. Colorful Grater
I bought a purple cheese grater today.
I didn’t even know you could get purple cheese.
57. Cheesiest Holiday
Why is Christmas the cheesiest holiday?
Because of baby cheese-us.
58. A Lot Of Cheese
When I got back from the store, my wife asked me if I’d bought any cheese.
I said, “Yes, I bought a Tunworth.”
59. Swiss Cheese
Why can’t Swiss cheese be part of a fat-free diet?
It’s made with hole milk.
What kind of cheese does Medusa eat?