Maybe you don’t understand how anyone could stoop so low but here’s a bumper collection of short people jokes to dwarf any others you’ll find anywhere else.
Funny Short People Jokes
It was just a little get together.
They’re always getting overlooked.
He said, “Sorry, I’m a little short.”
So tonight I’m going to make it up to her.
I’ve got a good bottle of wine and a DVD box set of her favorite TV show.
When she gets in from work I’m going to order her favorite takeaway which we’ll sit and eat while we drink the wine and watch the DVDs.
Then afterwards I’m going to go upstairs and run her a nice hot sink.
I don’t know how anyone could stoop so low.
Because they struggle to put food on the table.
The midgets were furious.
Because the grass tickles their balls.
They were really down-to-earth guys.
He’s a small medium who’s at large.
Because the steaks are too high.
Then one of them said to the other, “Let’s smoke some weed and get medium.”
He could finally hold his head up high.
Give a short person a hug.
He’s a little stiff now.
Because they’ve got short tempers.
Well they can’t reach for themselves, can they?
He was telling me all about baking flatbreads.
It was fascinating.
I love the Pita patter of tiny Pete.
The bouncer stopped me on the door and said I couldn’t go in.
I asked, “Why not?”
He said, “Because you’re not on the shortlist.”
A really short guy got out of it and said, “I’m not happy.”
I said, “Well which one are you then?”
Or as he called it, golf.
When he saw it coming down the road he broke into a jog.
It was getting closer and he still wasn’t at the bus stop so started sprinting but it drove off before he got there.
It was too little too late.
Teach math to midgets.
All I could think was, “Oh ye of little faith.”
That’s why midget porn is so popular.
I was just nuts over her.
“Get lost!” he said.
I said, “Ok, suit yourself,” as I straightened up my rucksack and carried on with my walk.
Because they keep tripping over the string.
It’s best not to tease him about though, or he’ll punch you in the knee.
I think someone put him up to it.
I was directing a stage version of “Snow White and the Seven Dwarves”.
Just before the show was about to start, the back-up dwarf ran over and said, “Steve has pulled out of the show. I’m sorry, it’s my fault. We had a fight.”
I said, “Well I hope you’re Happy now.”
Someone’s getting lucky tonight.
Short People Jokes
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