Women laughing at hilarious joke

Note On The Fridge

My girlfriend left a note on the fridge.

It said, “It’s not working. I can’t take it any more. I’m going to my mom’s.”

I opened the fridge door, the light came on, the beer was cold. What the hell did she mean?

Gnome laughing at funny jokes

Splitting Up Joke

I was in the park yesterday when I saw a tramp having a huge argument with his girlfriend on a bench. He suddenly stood up and poured his bottle of meths over the bench and set it on fire.

“What the hell are you doing?” I yelled at him.

He said, “She can leave me if she wants, but there’s no way she’s getting the house.”

Women laughing at hilarious joke

Acting Like A Detective

My girlfriend said to me, “You’re always acting like a detective. I want to split up.”

I said, “Good idea, we can cover more ground that way.”