A selection of the best and funniest music jokes and punsMusic Jokes & Puns

They don't come much sharper than these funny music jokes and puns - they definitely won't fall flat!

In fact, they rock and are sure to strike just the right note!

The key thing is - we hope you enjoy them!

Two windmills are standing in a field.

One asks the other, "What kind of music do you like?"

The other one says, "I'm a big metal fan."

I used to be in a band called "Sold Out".

Our gig posters looked great, but no-one ever came.

What do you call a gingerbread man with one leg bitten off?

Limp Bizkit.

What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce.

How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?

Put it in the microwave until it's Bill Withers.

Me and my friends are in a band called "Duvet".

We're a cover band.

How many indie hipsters does it take to change a light bulb?

It's an obscure number, you probably haven't heard it.

What do you get when you drop a piano down a mine shaft?

A flat minor.

What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A flat major.

My laptop's broken.

It keeps playing "Someone Like You" on a loop.

I think it's a Dell.

What kind of music are balloons afraid of?

Pop music.

With the rise of self-driving vehicles, it's only a matter of time before we get a country song where a guy's truck leaves him too.

What do hip-hop muscians put on their cuts and grazes ?

Ghetto plasters.

Me and some friends have just formed a band.

We've called ourselves "999 Megabytes".

We haven't got a gig yet...

My neighbors are listening to great music.

Whether they like it or not.

What's brown and sitting on a piano bench?

Beethoven's last movement.

I was given the worst Christmas present ever - a Bonnie Tyler sat nav.

It keeps telling me to turn around, and every now and then it falls apart.

What is a Jehovah's Witness' favorite band?

The Doors.

How do you fix a broken brass musical instrument?

With a tuba glue.

How does Bob Marley like his donuts?

Wi' jam in.

When my girlfriend said she was leaving me because of my obsession with the Monkees, I thought she was joking.

But then I saw her face.

What was stolen from the music store when it was robbed?

The lute.

Why couldn't the string quartet find their composer?

He was Haydn.

What do vegetarians order at a soul food restaurant?

The Ike and Tina Tuna.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide?

He didn't even leave a note.

What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

What has 72 legs and 26 teeth?

The first row of a country concert.

Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo' drizzle.

Whats the definition of Endless Love?

Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles playing tennis.

Rick Astley will let you borrow any movie from his collection of Pixar films except one.

He's never going to give you Up.

Why didn't Handel go shopping?

Because he was Baroque.

My girlfriend left me because of my obsession with Linkin Park.

But in the end, it doesn't even matter.

How do you find Will Smith in the snow?

Look for the fresh prints.

Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear.

Two Beach Boys walk into a bar.

"Round?"

"Round."

"Get a round?"

"I'll get a round!"

What's an avocado's favorite music?

Guac 'n' roll.

I fainted in the curry house when I heard REM had split up.

That's me in the Korma.

Middle C, E flat and G walk into a bar.

"Sorry," the barman said. "We don't serve minors."

Why did Bono fall off the stage?

He was too close to The Edge.

How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Six. One to change it and five to sing about how good the old one was.

What do you call a musician with problems?

A trebled man.

Arnold Schwarzenegger was invited to a famous composers' fancy dress party.

When asked who he was going as, he replied, "I'll be Bach."

Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano.

Why did Bach have so many children?

Because he didn't have any organ stops.

What does new age music sound like played backwards?

New age music.

How do you make a bandstand?

Take away their chairs.

Why did George Michael have chocolate all over him?

He was careless with his Wispa.

Music Jokes

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