Really Funny Jokes

Camouflage Training

I’m in the army and this afternoon I got called in to see my commanding officer. He growled at me, “I didn’t see you at camouflage training this morning.”

I said, “Thank you very much, sir.”

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Gnome laughing at funny jokes

I’m a Lumberjack

A lumberjack applies for a job and gets called for an interview.

The interviewer asks him, “So, what experience do you have?”

The lumberjack replies, “Well, I used to work in the Sahara Forest.”

The interviewer is a little taken aback and asks, “The Sahara Forest? Don’t you mean the Sahara Desert?”

The lumberjack says, “Yeah, that’s what they call it now.”

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Funny Joke

Not A Lawyer Joke

A cop arrives at the scene of an accident, in which a car has smashed into a tree. He rushes over to the car and asks the driver, “Are you badly hurt?”

“How do I know?” the driver replies. “I’m not a lawyer.”

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Funny Joke

My Neighbor Owes Me

A man visited his lawyer and said to him, “My neighbor owes me $500 and he won’t pay up. What should I do?”

“Do you have any proof he owes you the money?” asked the lawyer.

“No,” said the man.

The lawyer said, “OK, then here’s what you should do. Send him a letter asking him for the $1,000 he owes you.”

“But it’s only $500,’ replied the man.

“Exactly! That’s what he’ll reply and then you’ll have your proof!”

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Boy laughing at short funny joke

Believe In Life After Death

My boss at work said to me today, “Do you believe in the supernatural and life after death?”

“Yes, I think so,” I replied.

He said, “I thought you probably would. Yesterday after you left early to go to your grandmother’s funeral, she phoned up to talk to you…”

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