Smiley giving thumbs up to funny joke

Undercover Cop

Yesterday I saw a police officer wearing a pilot’s uniform.

I thought it was a bit odd.

Then I realised he was one of those plane clothes cops.

Funny rabbit joke

Say No To Drugs

The saying, “Say no to drugs” has always made me laugh.

If you’re talking to drugs, it’s probably too late to say no to them.

Idiot smiley laughing at hilarious joke

Strongest Days

Which days are the strongest?

Saturday and Sunday, the rest are weekdays but Saturday and Sunday are where the weekends.

Smiley grinning at good joke

Sorry For The Delay

I went to the doctor’s today and when I walked in, she said, “I’m sorry about your wait.”

I said, “So am I but it’s okay, I’ve been fat all my life.”

Rabbit laughing at funny joke

Office Security Guard

My boss told me that as a security guard, it’s my job to watch the office.

I’m on season 6 now but I’m not really sure what it’s got to do with security.

Rabbit smiley laughing at a good joke

About The Menu…

I said to the waitress, “Waitress, can I ask you something about the menu please?”

She said, “The men I please are none of your business!”

Laughing at funny short joke

LGBTQ

Every time I ask someone what the acronym LGBTQ stands for…

I can never get a straight answer.

Smiley laughing at funny one liner

Shipping Magnate

If someone makes their fortune in ships, we call them a shipping magnate.

If someone makes their fortune in oil, we call them an oil magnate.

What do you call someone who makes their fortune selling fridges?

Idiot smiley laughing at hilarious joke

Excuse My French

When I was a kid, my parents would always say, “Excuse my French” after a swear word.

I’ll never forget that first day at school when the teacher asked did we know any French.

Smiley sticking tongue out at funny joke

Martial Arts

I saw a Korean martial artist holding out a basket of donuts. When I asked if I could take two, he said no.

I said, “Can I at least Taekwondo?”