Smiley laughing at extremely funny joke!

Book Of Revelation

John the Apostle is writing the Book of Revelation.

He says to God, “So, Lord, the end will be signalled by trumpets?”

God replies, “No… I said Trump/Pence.”

John says, “Yeah, trumpets.”

God says, “No… oh, never mind. They’ll know.”

Laughing at funny short joke

Good Christian

I found someone’s wallet today, and as a good Christian I thought, “What would Jesus do?”

So I turned it into wine.

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Funny Quran Joke

My Muslim co-worker brought a CD copy of the Quran into work today.

He got really annoyed when I asked if I could burn a copy.

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Used To Be A Christian

My girlfriend just admitted that she used to be a Christian, so I broke up with her.

It might seem judgemental, but I’ve only known her since she was Christine.

Smiley grinning at funny joke

The Last Supper

Judas says to Jesus, “Come on Jesus, we’re going to be late for the last supper.”

Jesus says, “Late for the what?”

Judas says, “The supper… We’re going to be late for supper.”

Smiley laughing at a good joke

Death Bed Jew

A Jew was lying on his death bed. He asks his wife if she is there. She says that she is.

He asks his son if he is there. He replies that he is.

He asks if his daughter is there. She replies that she is.

As he finds out everyone is there, he has a heart attack and dies. His last words were, “Why… is no-one… in the shop?”

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Time For A Rest

After God had created 24 hours of alternating light and darkness, one of his angels asked him what he was going to do next.

He said, “I think I’m going to call it a day.”

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Ran Over A Nun

A guy runs into a bar, yelling at the bartender, “Quick, how tall is a penguin?”

The bartender says, “Oh, about 3 feet tall.”

The guy says, “Oh my God! I just ran over a nun!”