A selection of funny quotes about timeFunny Quotes About Time

Time is a great healer, they say, which is lucky as you'll need plenty of time to heal once your sides split from laughing at these funny quotes about time!

Enjoy!

Time is a waste of money. ~ Oscar Wilde

 

Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save. ~ Will Rogers

Aside from velcro, time is the most mysterious substance in the universe. You can't see it or touch it, yet a plumber can charge you upwards of seventy-five dollars per hour for it, without necessarily fixing anything. ~ Dave Barry

Time is a great healer, but a poor beautician. ~ Lucille S. Harper

The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time. ~ Bertrand Russell

Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils. ~ Hector Louis Berlioz

Never waste any time you can spend sleeping. ~ Frank H. Knight

How did it get so late so soon? It's night before it's afternoon. December is here before it's June. My goodness how the time has flewn. How did it get so late so soon? ~ Dr. Seuss

You can't turn back the clock. But you can wind it up again. ~ Bonnie Prudden

The bad news is time flies. The good news is you're the pilot. ~ Michael Altshuler

Time and tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of 30. ~ Robert Frost

As if you could kill time without injuring eternity. ~ Henry David Thoreau

A day wasted on others is not wasted on one's self. ~ Charles Dickens

There is a time for work and a time for love. That leaves no other time. ~ Coco Chanel

Time is the longest distance between two places. ~ Tennessee Williams

There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want. ~ Bill Watterson

Time is money, especially when you are talking to a lawyer or buying a commercial. ~ Frank Dane

They say I'm old-fashioned, and live in the past, but sometimes I think progress progresses too fast! ~ Dr. Seuss

Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent. ~ Ambrose Bierce

The less one has to do, the less time one finds to do it in. ~ Lord Chesterfield

Time is what keeps everything from happening at once. ~ Ray Cummings

Punctuality is the thief of time. ~ Oscar Wilde

The only way of catching a train I have ever discovered is to miss the train before. ~ G.K. Chesterton

The future is something which everyone reaches at the rate of sixty minutes an hour, whatever he does, whoever he is. ~ C.S. Lewis

Three o'clock is always too late or too early for anything you want to do. ~ Jean-Paul Sartre

No man goes before his time - unless the boss leaves early. ~ Groucho Marx

I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by. ~ Douglas Adams

People who cannot find time for recreation are obliged sooner or later to find time for illness. ~ John Wanamaker

I don't have time, energy, or interest in hating the haters; I'm too busy loving the lovers. ~ Steve Maraboli

Only time can heal your broken heart. Just as only time can heal his broken arms and legs. ~ Jim Henson

There's never enough time to do it right, but there's always enough time to do it over. ~ Jack Bergman

I am not particularly interested in saving time; I prefer to enjoy it. ~ Eduardo Galeano

Don't spend time beating on a wall, hoping to transform it into a door. ~ Coco Chanel

We must use time as a tool, not as a couch. ~ John F. Kennedy

To live is so startling it leaves little time for anything else. ~ Emily Dickinson

We love to buy books because we believe we're buying the time to read them. ~ Warren Zevon

So little time and so little to do. ~ Oscar Levant

I am definitely going to take a course on time management... just as soon as I can work it into my schedule. ~ Louis E. Boone

Enjoy life. There's plenty of time to be dead. ~ Hans Christian Andersen

And meanwhile time goes about its immemorial work of making everyone look and feel like shit. ~ Martin Amis

If you act like you've only got fifteen minutes, it will take all day. Act like you've got all day, it will take fifteen minutes. ~ Monty Roberts

Funny Time Quotes

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