Boy laughing at short funny joke

What Kind Of Fly?

One day a fly is buzzing around a wolf hound and decides to ask him, “What kind of dog are you?”

The dog replies, “I’m a wolf hound.”

The fly says, “A wolf hound? That’s an odd name. Why do they call you that?”

The dog says, “Well it’s quite simple really. My mother was a hound and my dad was a wolf.”

The fly replies, “Oh, I see…”

Then the dog asks the fly, “So, what kind of fly are you?”

The fly says, “I’m a horse-fly.”

The dog says, “NOOO WAAAAYYYYY!!!”

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Gnome laughing at funny jokes

Don’t Blame The Dog

This young Korean couple are lying in bed when the guy starts farting non-stop.

The girl can’t stand the smell and says, “Stop that! It’s disgusting!”

The guy says, “Don’t blame me, it’s the dog.”

“Don’t blame him,” says the girl. “He was cooked perfectly.”

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Funny Joke

That’s Rather A Large One

This guy has a 24 inch penis and it’s really getting him down. “I can’t go on like this, my penis is just too long” he thought to himself.

God hears him, takes pity on him and says, “Go to the pond near your home and ask the frog there to marry you. If she says no, you will lose 5 inches of your penis.”

So the guy goes to the pond and proposes to the frog there, and she says no. His penis shrank by 5 inches. So he asked her again and his penis shrank another 5 inches.

He thought to himself, “15 inches is still too long, but 10 inches should be ideal so I’ll ask her again.”

So he asked the frog to marry him again.

She replied, “How many times do I have to tell you!! NO! NO! NO!”

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Funny Joke

No Animals Were Injured

You know how the credits at the end of movies always say something like “No animals were injured in the making of this film”? Well what if they were?

Do they list it in the credits?

Brian hurt one monkey. He is very sorry.

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Hilarious Jokes

Weird Animals Joke

My wife and I were talking about people owning strange animals and she said, “I’ve always wanted to get a manatee.”

I said, “Thank you very much, I’ll have it with milk and two sugars please.”

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Funny Short Joke

Duck In A Drug Store Joke

A duck waddles into the drug store and says, “Sorry, I don’t have my wallet today but I need to buy a condom.”

The pharmacist says, “No problem. Shall I just put it on your bill?”

The duck exclaims, “Sir! What kind of a duck do you think I am?”

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Hilarious Jokes

Snail Attack Joke

A turtle was walking down the street when he was attacked by a gang of snails.

When asked by the police what happened he said, “I don’t know, it all happened so quickly.”

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Women laughing at hilarious joke

Not My Dog Joke

Bob walks into a bar and sits next to a man who has a dog next to him.

He says to the man, “Has your dog ever bitten anyone?”

The man replies, “No” but then the dog jumps up and bites Bob on the arm.

“I thought you said your dog’s never bitten anyone!” shouts Bob.

The man says, “I know. That’s not my dog.”

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Women laughing at hilarious joke

Dogged Pursuit – Funny Dog Joke

There was a knock at my door earlier. When I opened the door a policeman was stood there…

“Mr Jones?”, he asked.

“Yes,” I replied.

“I’m afraid your dog’s just been reported to have chased someone on a bike.”

I said, “I don’t think so – my dog doesn’t have a bike.”

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