Funny face laughing at hilarious clean joke

Empty Glass

I was in a bar last night when the bartender said to me, “I see your glass is empty. Would you like another one?”

I said, “Why would I want two empty glasses?”

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Laughing at funny short joke

For Whom The Bell Tolls

My top three assumptions when my doorbell rings:

1. It’s a murderer.

2. It’s the police come to tell me everyone is dead.

3. It’s that book I ordered about positive thinking.

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Hilarious Jokes

Funny Baptism Joke

A priest is baptizing this guy one day.

As he dips him in the water three times, he says “Joe, from now on you will be known as Matthew. From this day forth you are to shed your sinful ways and that includes no more gambling or alcohol.”

Later that day the guy goes home and heads straight for the fridge.

He grabs a bottle of beer and dips it in the sink. As he does so, he says “From this day on, you will be known as green tea.”

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Funny Short Joke

Funny Jesus Joke

Jesus and his disciples walk into a restaurant. Jesus asks for a table for 26. The head waiter says, “But there’s only 13 of you.”

Jesus says, “Yeah, we’re all going to sit on the same side.”

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