Dental Puns, Jokes And Humor
Get your teeth into these great dental puns and jokes.
No need to brace yourself - they're hilarious, so you won't be looking down in the mouth after reading them!
Enjoy our collection of funny dental puns, jokes and humor.
Where does a dentist get his gas?
At the filling station.
I've just seen on the news that an orthodontist has been found dead, with a hatchet embedded in his head.
Police are treating it as an axe-i-dental death.
A guy walks into the dentist's office with his wife and says to the dentist, "Listen Doc, I'm in a real hurry. I've got three buddies sitting out in my car waiting for us to play golf, so don't worry about the anesthetic. I don't have time for to wait for the gums to get numb. I just want you to pull the tooth, and be done with it! Today is Friday and we have a 10:00 AM tee time at the best golf course in town and it's 9:15 already."
The dentist thinks, "Wow! This is one brave guy asking to have a tooth pulled without using anything to kill the pain."
So he says to the man, "Sure Sir, which tooth is it?"
The guy turns to his wife and says, "Open your mouth and show him, dear."
I went to the dentist without lunch and he gave me a plate.
I was going out with this girl and I never knew she had a dental implant until it came out in conversation one day.
I've been to the dentists lots of time, so I know the drill.
I can't stop thinking about the root canal work I need doing.
It's deeply unnerving.
What did the dentist do on the roller coaster?
He braced himself.
What do you call two dentists who live on opposite sides of the world?
What's the best time to go to the dentist?
Tooth hurty (2:30)
What does the dentist of the year get?
A little plaque.
I went to the dentist today and he seemed very distracted.
I think he was brushing me off.
My toothache is driving me to extraction.
Why do dentists always seem moody?
Because they always look down in the mouth.
I went to the dentist.
He said, "Say, Aahhh"
I said, "Why?"
He said, "My dog's died."
"Please scream as loud as you possibly can," says the dentist to his patient.
The patient is confused, "Why should I do that?"
"The waiting room's full and the football starts in ten minutes."
I went on a date with a dentist last night.
At the end of the date, she said she'd had a great time and she'd like to see me again in 6 month's time.
Dentists have the same old grind, day after day.
Why didn't the dentist ask his receptionist out?
He was already taking a tooth out.
A patient goes to the dentist for a tooth extraction.
The dentist gives him some anesthesia and then quickly pulls out the tooth.
He says to the patient, "That'll be $500, please."
The patient says, "What! $500 for 5 minutes of extraction work? That's a complete rip-off!"
The dentist replies, "Well, I can make it longer if you'd like."
I've finally put my money where my mouth is.
I've got a gold filling.
What did one tooth say to the other tooth?
The dentist is taking me out tonight.
Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused a Novocain injection during root canal treatment?
He wanted to transcend dental medication.
Be nice to your dentist.
They have fillings too.
What did the dentist see at the North Pole?
A molar bear.
I've just seen a dentist having a big row with a manicurist.
They fought tooth and nail.
This guy and a girl meet at a bar and get to chatting.
They get on extremely well and when the bar closes they decide to go back to the girl's place for a drink.
After a few drinks, things are getting a bit frisky. The guy takes off his shirt and washes his hands.
He then takes off his socks and washes his hands.
The girl says to him, "You must be a dentist!"
The guy is amazed and says, "Well yes, but that's amazing. How did you know that?"
The woman replies, "That's easy. You keep washing your hands."
Anyway, after that things get even friskier and they end up in bed, where one thing leads to another.
After their passionate love making is over the woman says, "Wow, you must be a great dentist!"
The guy is a bit taken aback but pleased nonetheless and says, "Yeah, I sure am a great dentist. But how did you know that?"
The woman says, "That's easy. I didn't feel a thing."
My dentist never stops working.
He's a compulsive abscessive.
I went to the dentist today.
He said, "I'm going to put this brace on you as a stop-gap measure."
Going to the dentist can be very full filling.
What was the dentist doing in Panama?
Looking for the root canal.
I got kicked out of the dentist's for using all the nitrous oxide.
I had the last laugh though.
Why do dentists like potatoes?
Because they're so filling.
What do you call a dentist who doesn't like tea?
What did the dentist say to the golfer?
You have a hole in one.
Why did the king go to the dentist?
To get a new crown.
If a dentist makes money off people with bad teeth, why should I trust a toothbrush that 4 out of 5 dentists recommend?
On Monday I said to my boss, "I've a dentist's appointment this afternoon. Can I leave at two and make up the time later in the week?"
"Yeah, that's no problem," he said.
On Friday he came up to me and said, "What's this? You've put on your timesheet that you finished at 5 o'clock on Monday."
I replied, "Yeah I know. I told you I'd make the time up."
A woman saying she's not mad at you is like a dentist saying you won't feel a thing.
Funny Dental Puns And Jokes
If you enjoyed this collection of funny dental puns, jokes and humor, why not check out the rest of our site where you'll find lots more really funny jokes and laughs, including our nursing jokes, our yellow teeth jokes, our bad breath jokes, and our other work jokes including these: