I think most of you probably already know about the first rule of Assumption Club.
Moses was the first person to use Control-C as a shortcut.
I went along to the local Kleptomaniacs Anonymous meeting but all the seats were taken.
The Greek restaurant in my town is so authentic it’s gone bankrupt.
My Viagra addiction was the hardest time of my life.
I’ve got a friend who’s fallen in love with two school bags – he’s bi-satchel.
I had a joke about time travel but you guys didn’t like it.
I was walking down the street the other day when this guy with a premature ejaculation problem came out of nowhere.
People say I’m condescending…
That means I talk down to people.
I just wrote a book on reverse psychology…
Don’t buy it!