Funny Banana Jokes And Puns
Banana jokes are so ap-peel-ing! So we've not been up to any monkey business. Instead, we've gathered together a bunch of the best jokes around just for you.
We hope you enjoy our collection of funny banana jokes and puns.
She hasn't lost any weight, but you should see her climb trees now!
Because they don't want to wake up the rest of the bunch.
He says to the doctor, "Help me Doc, what's the matter with me?"
The doctor replies, "That's easy. You're not eating properly."
Because they peel.
As he enters he's hunched over and obviously in pain.
He walks up to the counter and says to the girl who's serving, "Banana Split, please."
The young girl asks, "Crushed nuts?"
The old man replies, "No, arthritis!"
A banana smoothie.
A pair of slippers.
The first guy says, "Girls just don't seem to be attracted to me."
The second guy asks, "What do you mean?"
The first guy replies, "Well sure, there's lots of really cute girls around. But they never even give me a second look."
The second guy says, "We can easily fix that! Just take a banana and put it in your pants."
"A banana?" asks the first guy, all confused.
The second guy says, "Yeah. Girls will go crazy for you."
So the first guy returns the next day with a banana stuck down his pants. All the girls notice all right, but they all just giggle and laugh uncontrollably leaving him humiliated. They're laughing so much none of them can take the time to explain to him what they're laughing about.
So the guy rushes over to the second guy's house to complain about what he felt was a joke he'd played on him, recounting on the way how everybody on the beach, girls and guys both, had laughed at him.
When he gets to his friend's house, his friend asks "Did you put the banana in your pants?"
"Yeah, see," the first guy replies, turning around to show the banana's bulge smack in the middle of the back of his pants.
Because they hang around in bunches.
Thanks, Mario Kart.
Apparently, they're long enough already.
They slide down the banana-ster.
They opened their lunch boxes which their mothers had packed for them and both took out bananas, which they'd never seen before.
The first guy eagerly peeled his banana and bit into it. Just as he did so, the train went into a tunnel.
When the train emerged from the tunnel, he saw that his friend was just about to eat his banana too.
He looked at him and said, "I wouldn't eat that if I were you."
"Why not?" his friend asked.
"I took one bite of mine and I went blind for half a minute."
Because he couldn't find a date.
Try and cheer it up.
I almost choked on my banana.
Luckily, I was wearing my Slipknot t-shirt.
Funny Banana Jokes And Puns
If you enjoyed our collection of funny banana jokes why not check out the rest of our site for lots more really funny jokes and laughs, including these: